How can I PERMANENTLY uncheck the "replace selected item" tick box when placing anything in Indesign. Sure, it will stay unchecked for that document but next time I sign in, the damn check box is enabled once again. I want it to default to unchecked but no-one has been able to explain how to do it.
(Simple reason is if I forget that something is selected, next time I go to place something else, it's replaced. Logic suggests it should be the other way around but it never has been).
Interestingly, you can't.
That'd be a good feature request @Rrrrrosco ... because that setting indeed doesn't 'stick' when you close and relaunch InDesign. If you pop over to Feature Request/Bug Report Form. You can submit it, ensure you give a good use-case for why you want this setting to become sticky, and InDesign Engineering team might be inclined to make a change in future releases, or add a preference setting that controls the default behaviour for the Place dialog box settings.
In the meantime there is a work-around you could use:
If you accidentally end up with a graphic placed in a selected item, immediately press Cmd-Z (Mac OS) or Ctrl-Z (Windows) and the loaded graphic icon will reappear. So you can then place it as an independent graphics.
I realise that's not an answer to your question, but hopefully will be helpful enough for future accidental replacements.